..........................................................................................................................................................................................................

interviews & features | dvds | equipment | clothing | books | videos

revisionism

in the days of the ubiquitous, lugged steel bicycle frame, the material was posssesed of sufficient tensile strength at narrow diameters to produce bicycles that were svelte. even looking at bicycles from the 50s and sixties, with brake cables arching from the top of the brake lever hoods, and the gear levers clamped around the upper reaches of the downtube, they embraced the definition of balanced. where, like an original porsche 911, or citroen 2cv, no addition or detraction was necessary. the bicycles of those days are and were, at the pinnacle of physical design. it's a state-of-the-art that persisted through early forays into carbon fibre, but one that, subjectively, was ignored when shifting to aluminium.

the metal, gleaned from bauxite via almost obscene amounts of energy, is lighter than steel, but lacking in tensile strength. the only means of augmenting that latter facet, is to increase the diameter of the tubing, a choice that ultimately led to those drainpipe downtubes. however, as predicted by newton's third law of motion (every action has an equal and opposite reaction), increasing the tube diameter had a causal effect on virtually every other part of the bicycle. in order to provide sufficient real estate onto which those large downtubes could be welded, not only had the headtube to be enlarged, but also the bottom bracket area, immediately offering a previously curtailed opportunity to fit larger headsets and bottom bracket spindles and their companion bearings.

this was the point where it became silly; in order to refrain from engineering enormous headset cups, the headset was moved inside the headtube, allegedly to increase stiffness. but when the same reason was quoted for installing the b/b bearings in external cups, you could tell that the hyperbole had originated in the farmyard. but this increased velocipedinal real estate was the marketing department's dream, for now it was possible to emblazon the manufacturer's name in very large, bold lettering that could be easily seen during the tours of france, italy and spain, not to mention any number of one day classics throughout the season. and aero, if nothing else, turned carbon bicycles into high speed billboards.

in fact, there was little to curb the paint shop's fervour, going so far as to apply decals to the underside of those big, fat downtubes to take advantage of the creativity demonstrated by the motorbike camaramen, who often held their cameras mere centimetres above the tarmac in the search for ever more obscure angles. in fact, my specialized crux cyclocross bike features the marque delineated under the top tube, a feature of which i was blissfully unaware during the first two years of ownership. so plastering the name there was obviously not for my benefit. seemingly my cynicism knows no bounds; hopefully those bike tubes were not solely enlarged to have the name writ large.

colnago have continued to offer two distinct lines of carbon frame; those made in the far east and those still constructed from carbon tubing and lugs in a small factory in cambiago, reputedly underneath ernesto's house. however, though they still pay lip service to lugged construction, originating on the c40, a carbon version of the master frameset, the lugs which appeared on the c68 were not the lugs you're looking for. and now that they have released the colnago c72, the former lugged areas seem more akin to aesthetics than constructional necessities. "no longer treated as purely structural junctions, they become defining elements of the frame's identity", to quote from colnago's press release. unfortunately another defining element of the frame's identity is the price tag, beginning at £6,300 just for the frame, and extending to £16,300 for a complete bike, replete with sram red axs, power meter and an enve wheelset.

the lugs are not the only thing to have changed on the carbon frame, however. 'neath the custom designed bottle cage, is "a hidden storage compartment" in which to smuggle documents across the border. but the most notable aspect, given what we've been discussing above, is the dramatic reduction in size of the downtube colnago logo. could it be that cambiago is, once again, ahead of the curve? a new trend?

thursday 16 april 2026

sticky

for some of you, at least part of the following will be a learning opportunity; for others, a walk down memory lane. in the halcyon days of yore, bicycles were, you may be surprised to hear, a lot simpler and mechanically rudimentary than they are today. bottom brackets did not feature press fit bearings, nor external cups, and nor were the spindles the diameter of drainpipes. there may not have been such a wide range of crank lengths, and they were more likely to be shiny alloy than dark carbon fibre. on decent wheels, the spokes were of stainless steel, perhaps butted, but invariably laced three-cross to either chromed steel or alloy, the former hardly the best of choices if you actually wanted to stop in a hurry, or at all.

sprockets on today's rear wheels can number as many as thirteen, for the time being, but rather than amalgamated into cassettes, the five sprockets of yesteryear were constituted into what was referred to as a freewheel. this screwed onto a standard threaded portion of the rear hub, for which, depending on make and model, required a proprietary tool to remove, when time came to replace it. if memory serves correctly, the maximum number of sprockets that could be acquired in freewheel format, was eight, before everyone followed shimano's lead and converted to cassettes. that, it has to be said, is a whole nuther bucket of bearings, which we'll leave alone for the time being.

indexed gears pre-dated the cassette, and friction shifting predated indexing, but the latter was of a more rudimentary operation, and generally confined to the rear derailleur. there seemed little point in indexing a maximum of three chainrings, and even today there are still those (me for instance) who query the necessity of so doing. action was by way of a thumbshifter, which simply clicked through all five gears in both directions. and that's where, it seems, the problem had occurred. if i might bring you up to speed, i received a phone call on tuesday morning from the adult son of a friend, visiting that friend over the easter school holidays. their own son had opted to indulge in a bicycle ride aboard what turned out to be a rather elderly child's bike; not too big, not too small.

related over the phone, the child had apparently clambered aboard, and commenced pedalling, before being pulled up short when the cranks stopped revolving. the phone call was by way of an enquiry to ask if i might have an idea as to the problem (i'm sure this must happen to more folks than just me). without seeing the bicycle, i figured the most likely problem was either that that chain had overshifted the freewheel and jammed between that and the hub flange, or, it had dropped off the front rings, and jammed at the bottom bracket. however, to aid my diagnosis, i asked the gentleman if the chain was still to be seen on the chainrings and the rear sprockets, which he affirmed was indeed the case.

unable to proceed further with my conclusions from a distance, i asked if he might send a couple of photographs of the transmission from which i could reach a more accurate conclusion and which he promised to do. in actual fact, no photos arrived and i subsequently received a second phone call alerting me to the fact that they were on their way into the village with the bicycle in the car.

it transpired that my initial suspicions were 100% accurate, and his assurance that the chain was still sat on the sprockets was 100% wrong. in fact, the chain had overshifted on the largest sprocket and was well and truly jammed solid behind the freewheel, probably as a result of trying to pedal through the initial problem, and simply making matter worse. in cses such as this, it's often possible to lever the chain from its stuck position with a large, flat blade screwdriver, but this proved completely impossible, so well stuck was the chain. as a confirmed luddite, i once owned a wide-range of freewheel removers, and an industrial strength bench vice that i used to remove freewheels. but that was a long time ago; they are no more.

the method of affixing a freewheel to a wheel hub has one fatal flaw; even if grease were applied to the threads when new, the chances are by now, it has solidified (it's amazing just how many bikes were assembled with no grease whatsoever on the freewheel threads) and it's a fact of physics that all that pedalling effort simply tightens the freewheel on the hub. this inevitably means that they are an absolute b****rd to remove. the removal process involved clamping the freewheel remover in the vice, placing the internal freewheel splines, still attached to the wheel, over the remover and using the leverage afforded by the wheel's diameter to unscrew the offending item.

but freewheels went out of fashion with the ark, and there had seemed little point in keeping all those freewheel removers. shimano freewheels adhere to the same remover pattern used on their cassettes, but the removers are rarely as sturdy as those designed for freewheels, and without the vice (rusted out of existence years ago), i really wasn't in a position to attempt removal, referring them instead to a friend of mine who has a neat bicycle workshop at the bottom of his garden.

much of what i have mentioned above is the very stuff of which richard's bicycle book was crafted. first published in 1979, not only did richard ballantine espouse the delights of cycling to the young at heart, but provided an enlightened overview of the mechanical intricacies of the albeit simpler bicycle of the times. but far from being solely an entertaining waft of nostalgia, the circumstances outlined brought me to wondering where or what might be the richard's bicycle book of the 21st century? nowadays there might be a vast repository of velocipedinal information on the interwebs, mangled beyond recognition by artificial intelligence, but none of that could possibly come close to owning, reading and re-reading a well-thumbed copy of richard ballantine's enthusiasm for getting about on two wheels.

ballantine died in 2013 at the age of 72. goodness knows what he'd think of today's bicycles, especially those 1300 watt electric motors mentioned only a matter of days past.

postscript: uk shimano distributors, madison, used to publish an annual bicycle catalogue entitled 'freewheel'. today's version would probably be called 'cassette', which doesn't have quite the same ring to it.

wednesday 15 april 2026

pedalgate

usually, if islay has any presence in the media, it's as a result of something related to whisky, but the recent (and continuing) calmac ferry problems appear to have elbowed aside the filling of the first cask at the newly built laggan bay distillery. for those who have been living 'neath a rock lately, similar to the compulsory mot test applicable to motor vehicles, passenger ferries are required to undergo an annual refit, necessitating the shipping equivalent of a chinese puzzle from november to may each and every year, to ensure every route has a ferry. however, though the aspirational lifespan of a west coast ferry has been pegged at 30 years, still part of the 2026 calmac fleet, the mv isle of arran is well over forty years old, with others not far behind. the historical reasons for this are many, but basically, the government (which owns caledonian maritime assets ltd (cmal) - owner of the boats and piers, and calmac which operates the ferries) didn't build boats when they should have been building boats.

a quick scan of the calmac fleet will appraise even the most innocent of bystanders, of the wide variation in ship design, a fact that causes problems during re-fit season, when potential replacements don't fit the piers. this is potentially being remedied with the construction of four islay class ferries in turkiye, the first of which arrived during march. however those four identical ferries don't fit any of the piers on the routes for which they were designed, necessitating millions of pounds in upgrade costs, the last of which will be islay's southern ferry terminal at port ellen. construction work to upgrade the latter will commence in june this year and expected to be complete by mid-2029.

this will entail all the islay-mainland sailings travelling between kennacraig and port askaig for the duration. even at the moment, when the first of those new ferries, the mv isle of islay actually sails on the route for which it was built (a long story), it is too big to berth at port ellen; hence the reason for the upgrade. you would be right in wondering why cmal doesn't simply build new versions of their existing boats that fit the piers already in place, but according to those who supposedly know, that would stifle progress. they might have a point, but it's not one that seems particularly well made. though in a tangential move in that direction, the mv isle of islay features a rear ramp with a movable section that can be moved from side to side to accommodate the majority of pier linkspans.

this lack of standardisation within a ferry network that is unashamedly but often laughingly categorised as a lifeline service, is perhaps only incidentally responsible for much of the chaos that has resulted over recent weeks, when ferries in drydock have had extended stays due to unresolved technical issues, and others have simply broken down. that 40+ year-old mv isle of islay is so old, spare parts are no longer available and calmac is considering having the necessary bits custom made, at considerable cost.

of course, the world is full of incompatibilities, not least that of the velocipedinal world, a subject i fear i may have visited once too often. but for most of the time, any incompatibilities that surface are mere irritation, easily, if not cheaply, remedied by a change in brand or model of component. it is not a situation you would imagine might prevent a professional cyclist from attempting to snatch victory in one of cycling's historic one-day monuments, but essentially, that's what happened to mathieu van der poel in sunday's paris-roubaix. uncharacteristically for the dutchman, he punctured on the brutal cobbles of the arenberg forest. team-mate, jasper philipsen quickly handed over his own bike, but mvdp was unable to make use of this selfless move because philipsen was riding prototype shimano pedals, and mathieu wasn't.

to be honest, that seems like a critical error either by van der poel, or team management; either every rider should have been on the prototypes, or none of them. no doubt shimano had perfectly good reasons for altering the format of their pedal cleats, probably citing similar reasons to those of cmal; to do otherwise would stunt progress. van der poel has won paris-roubaix three times, and seemed remarkably magnanimous in his post race interviews, not to mention being the first rider to congratulate race winner, wout van aert, despite assertions that the two riders are 'deadly' rivals. but to lose out on the possibility of a fourth cobble because of (two) pieces of plastic, surely gives pause for thought?

tuesday 14 april 2026

never mind the quality, feel the width

the old rule used to be, cheap road bikes featured 25mm tyre widths, while the classier versions sported 2mm less. this diktat was based predominantly on appreciation of the professional classes, augmented with a smattering of snobbishness. irrespective of the value of the bicycles of which we were in possession, it was quite often the tyre width that attested to our perceived level of seriousness. but the standard 23mm width was also realised at the behest of tyre manufacturers who assured us, at the time, that such was the optimum width to provide not only aero advantage, but reduced rolling resistance. bicycle manufacturers built their frames around such bona fide advice, which is why 23mm is pretty much the widest i can fit to my vintage colnago c40.

the cynic in me harbours a few suspicions over the apparently sudden realisation that wider rolled better than narrow, and that presenting several more millimetres of width to the incoming coefficiency of drag was actually an aerodynamic advantage. i'm still trying to figure out how that one works. however, in the age of gravel and all-road bikes, contemporary road bikes feature far greater tyre clearance which, if nothing else, makes the modern-day road bike a tad more versatile than its predecessor. of course, this has possibly resulted in increased sales for the tyre companies, coincidental to their discovery that wider rolls better (there's that cynicism again).

the union cycliste internationale (uci) has a somewhat chequered reputation for unilateral decision-making, not always, it seems, based on sage advice, or in one or two cases, any advice at all. grame obree fell foul of their spurious restrictions on his upturned handlebars, leading to his disqualification from the 4,000 metre pursuit. obree was revisited by the uci after he invented the so-called superman position. they also succeeded, for several years, in re-visiting history, by restricting attempts on the hour record to bikes closely resembling that ridden by eddy merckx in 1972, essentially based on very little. they have mandated the ratios of tube profiles on aero bikes, before retracting several of their original concerns, and more recently, incurred the wrath of many professionals through arguably ill-advised changes to handlebar width and angle of brake levers on those handlebars.

the majority of those decisions are/were reputedly based on safety concerns, though it's often hard to reconcile intent with actuality. and so far, none of those changes appear to have resulted in slowing the pace of the peloton, regarded as the principal cause of accidents in world tour events. but oddly enough, the sport of cyclocross does operate with restrictions on tyre width, religiously checked by a uci official prior to assembly of riders on the startline, with a rudimentary tool resembling an upturned fork crown. if it fits over the tyre, the rider is cleared to start. quite why cyclocross is restricted to a maximum 33mm tyre width, i know not, since it seems that no other branch of cycle sport is similarly curtailed.

gravel riders have already breached the 40mm width, often more likely to accede to a minimum of 45mm and above. mountain biking betrays its north american heritage by continuing to adhere to measuring its tyres in inches, and, it seems, inventing different tyre diameters to essentially achieve the same thing. but in mountain biking neither wheel size nor tyre width are regulated by the sport's governing body, and apparently, neither is that of road racing, which, in the grand scheme of things, seems a bit odd.

ahead of sunday's paris-roubaix, bike radar posted a short youtube video showing tadej pogacar to be pushing the upper limits of the tyre clearance on his colnago y1rs, by fitting a 35mm continental front tyre that, when measured with a pair of calipers, topped out at 37.9mm. had the race been wet and muddy, that might have given him more problems with grit 'neath the fork crown. however, that surely beggars the question as to why there is no legal upper limit on road bikes, even at paris-roubaix, when cyclocrossers, racing on arguably far more uneven surfaces, would be disbarred from starting if their front tyres reached 38mm.

i doubt that any of us understand the internal machinations of the uci, least of all the riders and cycle manufacturers; they seem, at worst, to be entirely unnacountable to anyone but themselves, and you often get the impression that some regulations are simply a work in progress; an attempt to see what they can get away with, or restrictions that can be redrafted at will if they are found to be wildly unpopular, or simply untenable. but i feel there ought to be some consistency, and that road riders being allowed to fit wider tyres than would be legal in cyclocross, is just plain wrong. i'd suggest a maximum of 30mm.

monday 13 april 2026

second class

a scottish pipe band still relies on a faux military hierarchy to define its organisational structure. effectively in overall charge of the band, is the pipe major; in the lower grades, that's usually the best piper in the corps, or the individual who thinks they're the best piper. the lead drummer (or leading tip), is sometimes referred to as the drum sergeant, again based either on seniority or drumming ability. in the early 1990s, when islay's piping society was in the process of transforming into a fully-fledged pipe band, as the only local drummer with both reading and teaching experience, i became the default lead drummer despite my total lack of any pipe band experience. keen to ensure i handled things correctly, i asked the lead drummer of a visiting pipe band, if he had any advice i could follow? his exact words were "don't do it!"

he continued to say that, the only words exchanged between the pipe major and himself throughout the year were "by the left, quick march." i actually thought he was joking, but as the years passed, i learned that his advice wasn't far from the truth.

however, given the type of community that exists on islay, any infractions between pipers and drummers tended to remain at a low level, but there's no denying that members of the drum corps are very much second class citizens. woe betide any drummer who attempts to tune up, or practice a particular part while the pipes are being tuned, yet the minute the latter has been achieved (often a remarkably lengthy process), the pipe major will inevitably call the band together in order to start playing, whether the drum corps is ready or not.

though pipers are unlikely to agree, it's a fact of life that they rarely play the same way twice; a tune may be rendered quicker or slower, but inevitably the feel or groove will be noticeably different each time, so it's always advantageous for the full band to play one or two tunes prior to any given performance to allow the lead drummer to gauge the state of play. but often, when preparing for competitive performances, the piping corps would spend so long tuning up, that there was scarce opportunity to have this happen, and thus the first time the the groove du jour could be assessed, was at the very point of competing. after a few years, if you're a drummer, you just learn to accept that that's the way things are, and try to forget all about it.

and while i have mentioned that many a lowly drum corps will recognise that of which i speak, i'm pretty sure that the vast majority of cyclists would also agree that second-class citizenship seems standard practice when it comes to interaction between ourselves and the motoring public. surprisingly, yet disappointingly, this even seems to persist between those of us on two wheels, and drivers of vehicles with bicycles mounted on a rear carrier or on the roof.

there are, of course, mitigating circumstances as well as something of a generalisation when framing matters in this way. for starters, cyclists cannot claim to equal the speed of any motor vehicle, irrespective of how fast we might think we are; but that really only applies to vehicles approaching from behind. on single track roads, we are undoubtedly slow-moving obstacles, and irrespective of how you might regard any hierarchy, in order to keep traffic flowing, it well-behoves all of us to move out of the way as soon as it is safe to do so, and allow any following vehicle to pass. however, that very state of affairs is fraught with disregard. as apparently an involuntary spokesman for my people, i am often regaled with tales of cyclists persisting along a single track road, riding past several passing places before doing the decent thing.

it may be that those portrayed miscreants simply didn't hear the vehicle(s) behind them, but that would then call into question why they didn't periodically check behind them?

but the cleated shoe can often be on the other foot, where car drivers, either ignorant or impatient, attempt to pass cyclists on a single track road, when there is clearly insufficient space to do so. this can backfire; the majority of single track roads in the hebrides are bordered by grass verges featuring drainage ditches, often unseen due to the length of the grass, but there nonetheless. i can think of specific occasions when the car has gone into the ditch attempting an ill-advised overtaking manouevre. funny at the time, but probably not for the driver and passenger(s). conversely, attempting not to put the vehicle's wheels into the ditch can cause the cyclist(s) to end up in the ditch on the opposite side.

our second class status seems often to class us as acceptable collateral damage.

however, the velocity of a cyclist and oncoming traffic is of no real nevermind, but the general approach appears to be that the velocipedinists are honour bound not to slow the progress of that oncoming vehicle, that it is our responsibility to get out of their way. i am nothing if not courteous in my attempts to do so; after all, in the majority of instances, i am in no rush to go anywhere in particular; i'm just riding in circles before going home for a hot shower and a change of clothes. but it would be nice if the honour system applied every bit as much to motorists as it does to cyclists. if a driver reaches a passing place before the cyclist does, it would be nice if they did the decent thing and pulled in to allow the cyclist to pass unhindered. occasionally, that does happen, but nine times out of ten, it doesn't.

my tediously laboured point here is what kind of mentality has to apply when the driver doesn't stop despite it being plainly obvious that the cyclist has nowhere to go, other than pull onto the grass verge to avoid a collision? granted, i live here, i cycle the roads with astonishing regularity and the location of every passing place is tattooed on the inside of my eyelids. but it is the onus of every road user to make themselves aware of road conditions and other traffic, particularly on single track roads. so what has to happen for a presumably sensible, intelligent individual behind the wheel of a vehicle capable of causing serious injury, if not death, to consider themselves the superior presence, and that just because you or i are riding a bicycle, it is our duty to get out of their way?

i admit there is a certain level of parochiality in my query, given that in two similar instances which happened yesterday afternoon, this is my home, these are 'my' roads, so why am i the one who has to give way, when the driver has passed one, if not two passing places while heading in my direction?

the local community council has published several iterations of a leaflet, clearly explaining the etiquette and practicalities of driving on islay's roads, yet still the iniquities continue, proving, if nothing else, that it's not necessarily a case of education. for many visiting drivers, arrriving in the hebrides may be the first time they have ever experienced single track roads; but the onus is surely on them to learn in advance? or, that not being the case, to err on the side of caution, rather than drive roughshod on a wing and a prayer? but if the prevailing mentality is that cyclists are, indeed, second class citizens, we're on pretty much a hiding to nothing.

sunday 12 april 2026

what do we want, if we want it now?

in january 2006, adobe released a public-beta of 'project shadow', a piece of software designed specifically for photographers. if you thought that they already sold photoshop with sufficient features to keep any photographer happy, then you'd be partially correct. however, photoshop, version one of which was released in 1990, was not originally aimed at photographers; the first commercially viable digital camera for less than £1,000 was apple's quicktake 100, but it wasn't available until 1994. photoshop, previously known as barney scan was bundled with a scanner to allow users to adjust scanned images.

project shadow which subsequently became adobe lightroom, worked on a remarkably simple premise, allowing photographers to download an entire shoot, displaying thumbnails of each image and the ability to choose which of those to download. once on your computer, it was possible to apply basic adjustments to the entire catalogue at once, or simply work on a single image. selecting the entire download offered the opportunity to apply keywords simultaneously to aid later searching. basically it sought to replicate some of the practical tasks previously carried out by photographers when images were stored in filing cabinets, or slide libraries.

the purpose of releasing a free, public beta, was to ensure that many of those at whom the software was aimed, would have the opportunity to contribute the ideas and practical needs which they, as professional photographers, felt were necessary. unfortunately, this free-for-all resulted in what i believe is usually referred to as bloatware, with the constant addition of features already available in the likes of photoshop. however, it is a fact of life that many photographers, though they might own a copy of photoshop, are rarely proficient in its use, preferring to employ assistants to carry out any digital corrections or enhancements as required. the best of the best tend to aim to get it right in the camera, minimising any post production work.

so unfortunately, many of those submitting their recommendations and suggestions to adobe, appear to have been blissfully aware that lightroom photos could be easily opened in photoshop. thus modern-day lightroom replicates a great number of photoshop's capabilities, in my opinion, unnecessarily. the original cataloguing concept still exists, but lightroom can now achieve many things that i doubt were part of the original mission statement. and i fear that the e-bike has been heading in the same direction since its inception, and shows little signs of slowing down.

we are, i believe, well accustomed by now to the way that progress in the bicycle industry manifests itself, often falling over itself to provide solutions to problems that don't actually exist. electric gears and hydraulic brakes on road bikes spring easily to mind. there is, it seems, a constant need to provide something new, whether by way of colour, material, manufacture or, in the case of the road bike, less aerodynamic drag and greater speed. the not so humble e-bike was originally developed, i believe, to offer an economic and practical means of transport for the elderly, the infirm, or those without the ability to propel themselves over greater than walking distances.

unfortunately, humanity has an inherent desire to find ways of reducing any personal effort, whether by means of remote control or, more recently, voice control of unnecessary household gadgets. thus, it has become commonplace, not just in the hebrides, to witness healthy youngsters travelling the highways and byways aboard hired e-bikes, even when possessed by an innate ability to have walked or ridden an acoustic bike. and as time has passed since e-bikes garnered mass popularity beginning around 2010, there has been a concomitant and often blatant desire to have these e-bikes reach their destinations more quickly than the pedelec blueprint originally suggested. s-pedelecs, often capable of moving in excess of 48kph by means of a throttle and no actual pedalling input by the rider are almost as common in the uk as are the more sedate, 25kph versions, even though the former are illegal in the majority of european countries, including britain.

yet that appears not be a barrier to progress. a normal, legal pedelec features an electric motor with a power output of around 250 watts, while there are faster, but illegal e-bikes with 750 watts at their fingertips. many manufacturers are engaged in lobbying various parliaments to legalise these s-pedelecs, despite many exceeding the handling capabilities of elderly and younger riders. i believe that amsterdam is already cracking down on so-called fatbikes, capable of moving considerably faster than the legally allowed 25kph, banning them from the network of cycle paths that criss-cross the city. yet e-bike motor manufacturer, avinox has just released its m2 motor, the most powerful variant of which has a claimed 1300 watts at its disposal. though specifically designed for use in e-mtbs where power doesn't necessarily have to equate to speed, a recent article in bikebiz pointed out that "these second generation motors are so light that they could easily be fitted to urban e-bikes or bikes from other categories."

be careful what you didn't wish for. there may not be too many things left unsaid in the realm of the acoustic bike, but it seems the e-bike is ripe for a whole slew of additions nobody actually asked for.

saturday 11 april 2026

writ large

i know you will think considerably less of me when i reluctantly admit that i have, wholly unnecessarily, bought myself a second slingerland radio king snare drum. as if one, white marine pearl, nickel over brass hooped limited edition, radio-king snare wasn't quite enough for a mere amateur such as myself. admittedly, this particular drum is not issued in limited numbers, features only steel hoops under the nickel-plating, and is two inches deeper than its partner-in-crime. oh, and rather than receiving a radio-king embroidered hard case as part of the deal, this time round i had to purchase a protection racket aaa case separately.

having passed on, under a permanent, temporary loan, a drum workshop jazz-series snare to one of my former students, there was a contrived opening for a replacement, one which has now been filled. and i have even been able to justify (to myself, if no-one else) this particular purchase on entirely spurious grounds. the shallower, limited edition radio-king, cost considerably more than its successor, and given its limited edition status (only fifty of that size and finish were made), i am reluctant to take it to gigs where its personage might be subject to accidental damage.

however, the original radio-king snares from the 1940s were constructed from a single ply of american maple, with handcut maple reinforcement rings. their modern-day reproductions, made by craviotto, feature a similar constitution, providing a sound simply not achievable with ply shells. so in order to spare the blushes of my limited edition snare, yet afford me the sound i now know i heartily desire (and at a size first seen in the original gene krupa snare of the 40s), i now look forward to my next gig. of course, i am under no illusions that anyone else will notice the sonic and aesthetic excellence of this particular drum, but i know i will, and that's enough for now.

but it doesn't quite stop there. sitting on the table next to my leather armchair, for now at least, is a small, black, suede-type bag, featuring the words slingerland u.s.a. and inside which is a slingerland monogrammed drum key. it's hardly the most expensive part of the purchase, but it does potentially allow me, when in polite company, to withdraw the bag from the pocket of my jeans and loudly mention, "i think this calls for use of my slingerland drum-key", thus advertising my superior percussive sensibilities at the same time. after all, the snare is the drum effectively hidden behind the drumset, and where's the point of owning a white marine pearl, 14x7", single-ply slingerland radio-king, if you can't force that upon unsuspecting bystanders?

so why aren't bike companies like that? for instance, were i to be blessed with the financial wherewithal to acquire a tadej replica colnago, or, perchance, a wout van aert liveried cervelo, wouldn't i (or you) wish to advertise that fact to all and sundry? granted, riding at the head of the sunday peloton aboard just such a velocipede, it would be the very definition of pointless to be clad in a team uae or visma lease-a-bike jersey, but what about civilian life? i'm not suggesting the wearing of either of the above-mentioned jerseys when undertaking the weekend shop at the local averagemarket, but suppose, having spent colossal amounts of money on either bicycle, colnago or cervelo were to supply a suitably monikered podium cap, casquette or t-shirt along with each bicycle purchase, that would enable me/you to lord it over others who settled for a carrera or chinese-branded carbon bicycle.

even the latter could throw in an enamel pin badge or neck buff advertising your allegedly superior choice of bicycle. with contemporary track mitts effectively eschewing the oval gap on the back, no longer is it possible to recognise fellow members of the cognoscenti via the traditional oval tan patch on the back of my/your hand. and even were the leather mitts of yesteryear still available, the almost complete lack of sun in the hebrides has totally undermined any thoughts of even a faint tan. police protection officers are frequently in the habit of wearing a subtle pin badge on their lapels; should they find themselves working with unknown colleagues, they can recognise the good guys in the crowd.

being able to do likewise when not in the peloton, midst ordinary civilians, is undoubtedly in all our interests. (i fully expect the industry to grasp this opportunity with both track-mitted hands.)

friday 10 april 2026

missing in action

i don't propose to reprise my inveterate tantrums against the iniquities of every live cycling race now hiding behind a very expensive paywall on tnt sports. it's not a state of affairs that affects only yours truly; plenty of uk cycling fans have either succumbed to substantial monthly payments or, at least partially like me, opted to live in a cycle-sport free world (until cyclocross season begins once again in october). so in the early months of this year, i have resisted any temptation to regale you with just how many sleeps it was until paris-roubaix, a habit i have laboriously cultivated in previous years.

i am not, however, entirely bereft of resultage each weekend, thanks to the youtube largesse of the selfsame tnt sports, which conveniently shows the final few kilometres of the most worthwhile cycling events. for instance, i know that tadej trounced mathieu, remco and wout over the cobbles of flanders, and thanks to the occasional gander at the online cycling press, i am also aware that tadej's perpetual victories are causing some turpitude within the professional peloton. in the same way that mvdp wins each and every cyclocross event in which he is entered, tadej is apparently, yet quite understandably, undermining the hopes of his fellow professionals. already, i have seen features ruminating over who might take second place at the end of those three weeks in july.

one or two colleagues have announced that they might take advantage of tnt's monthly subscription model by ponying up at the beginning of july, then cancelling before august appears on the horizon. with itv4 having already announced no live coverage of this year's event, for the first time in many a long year, the more casual cyclesport fan will be without any opportunity to dip in and out of what many regard as the season's premier cycle race. i, on the other hand, have resigned myself to follow the race via the online pages of the above mentioned cycling media, with the occasional peek at youtube (assuming tnt extend their generosity to the tour).

what i have discovered, however, is that, without the need to settle down on a saturday or sunday afternoon to watch any number of professional races, all of which last substantially longer than a one hour cyclocross race, there's less pressure to either cut a bike ride shorter than i'd like, or scoff my cheese and onion toastie a tad faster than advisable. it's a bit early in the season to decide whether this is a situation with which i'm likely to find favour, particularly after many years of getting best value from my eurosport/discovery+ subscription. for the time being at least, there is scant need to justify a monthly outgoing of £30.99.

as for the tadej dilemma, perhaps this is the choice season to de-escalate my live viewing habit, if the slovenian fulfils his promise to win everything in sight. that gets tedious very quickly. one can only hope he doesn't acquire a taste for cyclocross.

thursday 9 april 2026

switched on?

reputedly, though acoustic bike sales have either declined or stagnated, the e-bike continues to honour its status as saviour of the bike industry. its prospects look remarkably fortuitous across the pond, forecast to increase by around 11% by the end of the decade, and the genre apparently continues to show significant growth in both mainland europe and the uk. some of this growth is aided and abetted by cheaper prices; as the technology allegedly improves and competition increases, costs have begun to settle at a lower level (5% cheaper in 2024, compared with 2022).

however, many of us will recall the weekend supplement adverts of yesteryear where it was possible to buy his and hers mountain bikes for a penny less that £100, when it seemed everyone and their best pals simply had to ride a mountain bike with its plethora of gears. but it was these predominantly poorly made examples that led to the coining of the term, bicycle-shaped-objects (bso). there was very little quality control exercised over the final product; several sellers' were quite happy to send out replacements for faulty product, without requiring return of said faulty product. it's almost as if they were aware of their deficiences when they placed the advertisements. the majority of these bicycle-shaped-objects emanated from far eastern manufacturers, without any previous position in the bicycle industry, presumably having identified a nascent market that might return a quick profit.

the same seems to be happening once again in the e-bike market, where there's probably little necessity to create a bicycle frame with any sort of resilience built-in. matters could be even further simplified if, instead of identifying a frame with space for an electric motor, the latter could easily be relegated to the rear wheel.

many city centre and urban areas of the uk have already highlighted the number of illegal e-bikes in use, predominantly by local delivery riders with no qualms about riding e-bikes without mandatory pedal-assist. the majority of riders of such machines are not what you and i would refer to as cyclists; they've simply invested in a method of transport that is cheap, easy to use, and which can whizz through pedestrianised city centres with scarce concern for the pedestrians themselves. however, apart from low prices, low cost e-bikes from often unheard of manufacturers, along with similarly illegal electric scooters, come with a serious and potentially dangerous caveat.

according to a report in yesterday's guardian newspaper, e-bike fires have increased by 38% in 2025 over reported numbers in 2024. experts have laid the blame squarely at the door of 'cut-price products', renewing concerns over the use of cheap lithium-ion batteries and unregulated marketplaces from where these products are often sourced. figures from the fire brigade report 432 e-bike fires across the uk in 2025, up from 313 the previous year. and every bit as concerning, e-scooter fires were up to 147, from 123 in 2024. and just to be clear, these were battery fires, invariably occuring when being charged. the bicycles themselves are effectively as safe as acoustic bikes.

the guardian article continued, "The fires are often caused by the failure of lithium batteries, conversion kits or chargers. Products from online marketplaces have been found to be at greater risk of failure than those sold by established retailers." apparently there is even a growing black market in diy and counterfeit batteries "...particularly for delivery riders." some of these have been cobbled together from battery cells reclaimed from used disposable vapes. even after over one hundred years of the acoustic bicycle, is anyone aware of a black market in reconditioned campagnolo derailleurs?

me neither.

i'm fervently hoping that any e-bike-owning readers of these dubious, daily monologues, are of sufficient intelligence and social standing to have opted for a legally constituted pedelec, sourced from a reputable manufacturer and charged using the official unit supplied with th bicycle. or, if it's a replacement, it is from the same manufacturer, as is the battery. official replacements of the latter can be expensive; specialized and others of similar repute, charge marginally less than £1000, but saving money by choosing a cut-price battery from an unregulated source, could conceivably cost you the bike, your home or ultimately, your life.

as don adams said in the 1960s, 'get smart'.

wednesday 8 april 2026

could it happen to us?

my employer spends approximately £85 per month paying for the software that we use on a daily basis; if payment isn't made, the software simply stops working. though this monthly subscription provides access to everything the software company offers, in the main, we use only three programmes with any regularity. however, despite several searches across their websites, it appears to be impossible to acquire a licence for just the three items we need. granted, on a few exceptional instances, i've made use of other programmes, so i do appreciate the flexibility of the subscription, but long gone are the days when we could purchase individual items and, having paid for them, they belonged to us and would continue to work as long as we weren't too fastidious about upgrading the system software on which they ran. and because everything is electronic, the manufacturer has us over a barrell. everytime a programme is launched, it checks the server to ensure we're fully paid up before proceeding.

given my location, were i to have bought a bicycle on subscription, then defaulted on the payments, the manufacturer would have to send someone to the island to physically retrieve the bicycle from my grasp. of course, that very fact might well have prevented me purchasing the bicycle in this manner in the first place. when i sold muddy fox bicycles, they offered payment plans for customers, but uk mainland only. when asked why, they made it plain that should anyone default on subsequent payments, it could cost more to re-possess the bicycle than it was actually worth. with software, there's nothing tangible to collect. but the software aspect provides manufacturers with a constant revenue stream with little in the way of outgoings.

this particular avenue has already been exploited by some e-bike manufacturers, whereby a subscription fee is charged to access certain software features that make the bicycle a more attractive proposition for a large proportion of their customer base. but the fickleness of the bicycle industry at present, with many e-bike manufacturers having little or no history in tradtional bicycle manufacturing, when the water proved to be too hot, several disappeared quite quickly, either deliberately or as a result of economic factors, leaving customers more or less high-and-dry and bereft of those additional features on which the bicycles were originally sold.

if this sounds just a tad far-fetched, witness the car manufacturer that has done just that, deactivating the smartphone app that once offered their car owners the opportunity to carry out several bonus tasks remotely, such as switching on the car heater fifteen or so minutes before it was time to leave, or to check various fluid levels without getting their hands dirty. i'd imagine we're all used to apple or microsoft removing support for elderly versions of their operating systems after a number of years (lifespans which seem to shorten disturbingly frequently), but assuming you're not planning on performing any highly technical, mission critical projects, the software will continue to function for a good number of years past this imposed sell-by date.

some of the cars affected by the software switch off, are a mere three years-old. conversely, i own a 24 year-old drumset, but it still works.

so are we perhaps being naive in thinking the bicycle industry is aware of this means of maintaining revenue without overly extending themselves, but has, so far, opted not to join the party? i'd imagine the odds on things remaining the way they are forever, are considerably less than betting shimano, sram and campagnolo have already fostered subscription departments, all of which are simply waiting for the first of the three to pull the pin. electronic groupsets, irrespective of how they're configured, rely on hardware and software; while we have to buy both, we only have ultimate control over one of them. the reset buttons featured on some versions, are simply the velocipedinal way of switching it off, then on again.

so, should that fateful day arrive (probably sooner than later, though it would require the componentry to have an internet connection), despite the likes of a di2 groupset still costing the same as it does today, there might well be an added software subscription, without which, nothing works.

and so the conspiracy theory continues.

tuesday 7 april 2026