..........................................................................................................................................................................................................
a moving experience
though we're possibly all too hard on ourselves when checking the average speed display on the garmin at day's end, what we're probably a tad short on, is patting ourselves on the back for a job well done. think about it; science has yet to comprehend just how a machine with two, in-line wheels has the ability to remain balanced, even when operated by a cyclist. yet we insouciantly remove the bicycle du jour from the bike shed, check the tyre pressures, clamber aboard and cycle off into the sunset without a second thought. though it is claimed many things are like riding a bicycle, in that you rarely forget how, it has come as a bit of a surprise to learn just how many folks claim never to have learned how to ride one. yet, here we are, riding endless kilometres each and every weekend without even considering the major skills at the tip of our cleats.
and those skills are placed in even closer perspective, when you consider that few, if any of us, have to concentrate on the mechanics of cycling while we're riding. a friend and i rode the full circumference of loch gorm yesterday, in beautiful but somewhat chilly conditions, enjoying the scenery, having a bit of a laugh attempting to count barnacle geese in a field at ballinaby, yet all the while continuing a conversation that had nothing at all to do with cycling. when teaching drums, i have encouraged my students to attempt to hold a conversation while playing simple beats, purely on the basis that the brain is generally unable to concentrate fully on more than one task. if you can successfully hold a coherent conversation, the drumming technique has become innate.
likewise cycling.
so, as we demonstrate such advanced technical ability without major concentration on our part, there is time to think of things other than the ride itself. it's one of the major benefits of cycling. and, as we headed ever nearer to loch gorm, the need to change gear brought into focus, the simple, yet complex job accomplished by the parallelogram derailleur, a system disallowed to tour de france competitors until 1937. according to cycling's impressive heritage, though derailleurs existed at the point where le tour finally allowed their use, by common consent, the direct ancestor of the modern derailleur is campagnolo's gran sport, introduced in 1949.
there have been many attempts to pull the rug from under the derailleur; sturmey's three-speed and five-speed hub gears, along with variants produced by shimano, and the pinnacle of the genre, but remarkably heavy, rohloff fourteen-speed hub gear. though all of the above have been tipped as the logical, fully-enclosed replacement for the derailleur, here we are in the third decade of the 21st century, and the derailleur not only closes on a century of existence, but still features at the top level of professional cycle racing. that doesn't of course, exclude its efficacy from the every day cyclist, but despite the continued development of the hub gear, it remains the majority choice.
and the classified hub system, designed to obviate need of the far simpler front derailleur, unless i've missed the point by a huge degree, is a far more complex and expensive solution to a problem that doesn't exist, that really brings nothing to the party. unless riding with badly adjusted mechanical gears, we give barely a second thought to how or when we change gear during the ride. the only major developments of the derailleur system in those one hundred years, has been the introduction of indexing, followed this century by its electrification. and even that can be viewed as a solution looking for a problem.
really, how hard was it push a small lever to change gear, as opposed to pressing a button?
so while you and i can congratulate ourselves on a job well done, remaining humble in our display of some serious co-ordination and balance, we ought now and again to pause and offer veneration to the gear-changing system that has brought us to this level.
image: campagnolo
monday 17 november 2025
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................disrespect
i'm not entirely proud of learning quite how predictable i am. following my health scare earlier this year, when mrs washingmachinepost phoned me in hospital (and i can but admit that i have no recollection of this), the first question i asked her was "is my bike ok?"; probably not the response my poor wife was expecting or, indeed, hoping for. and, having detailed the joy of mechanical fettling, such as replacing the chain a couple of days past, i must also admit that, when the old chain had been removed, i grabbed a cloth from the bikeshed, and proceeded to polish the bicycle's nether regions. after all, when your bicycle sports a new, unmarked chain, it makes sense to have the frameset looking its best.
but in the majority of cases, the bicycles we have eagerly waiting in the bikeshed, have been acquired with our very own money. not for us a phalanx of team bikes and a nearby service-de-course when the bar tape looks a bit tired. that, perhaps, explains the prevailing attitude of the professional classes, who, i am reliably informed, view their bicycles simply as tools of the trade. it seems very unlikely that mvdp or wva are in the habit of imposing cute names on each of the bicycles at their behest (as i believe to which several of my friends have embarrassingly admitted).
that said, hands up all those who return from what we whimsically refer to as 'training rides' and immediately retrieve the karcher pressure washer and give the bike a darmed good clean before we too, take a hot shower?
i thought not.
in 2014, rapha kindly invited me to the first of their travel events in le grand banc, in french provence. on arrival, we were each presented with a black pinarello dogma, bearing our surnames at the saddle end of the top tube, accompanied by an appropriate national flag. since scotland's independence referendum was due to be held in september of that year, i did receive a couple of apologies for the application of a union jack instead of a saltire. after each day's ride, a mechanic took the bikes to his lair and cleaned them within an inch of their carbon fibre, ready for the following day's grand départ. i may not have reached an acceptable escape velocity during the day, but other than that, it's the closest i've ever been to living like a pro.
but, in order to closely resemble a professional rider, perhaps i would have required to take matters into my own hands. after all, we've all seen the likes of bjarn riis, david millar and others express their displeasure at their own performance, or that of the hapless bicycle, by slinging it onto the roadside verge, or over a nearby wall. at the beginning of the 24/25 cyclocross season, following a racing incident between ryan kamp and eli iserbyt, the latter stamped on the rear wheel of kamp's colnago, presumably destroying the campagnolo super-record derailleur in the process. yes, he received a fine and a three-race ban, but at the point of the televised incident, iserbyt showed scant regard for the value of the componentry violently disdained.
and, as quality bicycles become ever more expensive, along with the associated componentry, it seems that disrespect by the professionals is on the increase. this was pointed out by ian field, former british cyclocross champion and currently a commentator on tnt sports. during yesterday's telenet super prestige strawberry cross. around one particular muddy chicane, one of the riders lifted his bicycle by the handlebars and top tube, while those following simply grabbed the bars and dragged their bicycles around the turns.
we may not be fast, but we're far more polite to our bicycles.
sunday 16 november 2025
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................the benefits system
i'm presuming that the majority of us have already (hypothetically) signed up to the charter that proposes 'cycling is good for you', even if it wasn't actually the reason we started cycling in the first place? after leaving college, i sought gainful employemnt for a year or two, until i could figure out the real point of reputedly being a 'qualified' artist. try as i might, there seemed to be little demand for those particular skills in the job market during the late 1970s. i'd imagine nothing much has changed even today.
having had reasonable success at a summer position while at college, i was able to extend that success into full-time employment, at least for a short period of time. by that time, i had acquired my driver's licence, along with my first motor car, one that scarcely compares to the vehicles many teenagers seem to be able to afford nowadays. though i have no great wish to discuss the mechanics of the latter day, 20th century motor car, to improve a sense of relevance, i feel honour bound to mention that it featurd a manual choke, a dashboard mounted lever that enabled a larger quantity of petrol to enter the carburettor when the engine was cold at startup, encouraging it to rund a tad more smoothly than had the choke been left unused.
unfortunately, my parents' house, in which i was living at the time, was only a short distance from my place of employment, meaning that the choke was required on both the outward journey anad the return, the car having sat unused throughout the day. with a job that paid what nowadays would undoubtedly be referred to as 'minimum wage', the amount of petrol being consumed by the motor car was, i believed at the time, to be somewhat on the excessive and uneconomic side. to obviate that particular problem, mrs washingmachinepost bought me a bicycle on which to ride the aforementioned, short distance, and economic surety was once again restored.
only in retrospect did it dawn on me that the short daily cycle was proving physically and mentally beneficial, two conjoined aspects that had not been even a peripheral consideration at the time of velocipedinal adoption. these were found only to increase when mrs washingingmachinepost and i bought our own abode some considerable distance farther from my place of work. aside from arriving in a far better state than the majority of my work colleagues each morning, the homeward ride each day, allowed for moments of reflection on the day's machinations. though mental health was hardly a topic of discussion in those days, i can readily testify with retrospective gaze, that cycling did a great deal to help keep me sane, though such did not occur to me at the time.
as a result of being entirely dependent on the bicycle for transportation and leisure purposes here in the hebrides, i am far better aprised of the benefits to be gained from two wheels as opposed to four (not to mention the persisting economic benefits). as an island dweller, i can always get to wherever i need to be by bicycle, even on days when teh weather is less than clement, and, as someone far wiser than i once said, "nothing's ever worse after a bike ride." and there's the oft-mentioned benefit of riding to debbie's on alternate friday afternoons after a hard week at the coalface.
but for some of us, the bicycle is a gift that keeps on giving, particularly if you possess even basic mechanical predilections.
my cyclocross bike has reached the time of life where it demands a new chain, a task that ought to be regularly undertaken in order not to have the expense of also purchasing a new cassette. to undertake this with some level of perspicacity, i have found it helpful, after removing the old chain, to remove the cassette and clean it as best i can, along with the (single) chainring and the derailleur jockey wheels. it seems prudent, if fitting a new chain, to ensure that the componentry on which it depends, does not transfer mucky stuff to its newfound shiny countenance.
that very task i undertook on friday afternoon, taking just under an hour, predominantly due to the cassette being a tad more grubby than is seemly in polite company. and might i interject to point out that, if undertaking a similar sram chain removal, get yourself a decent pair of master-link pliers; they may be a one-trick pony, but it's a trick worth having. with a bike ride followed by bike maintenance, my cup overfloweth.
saturday 15 november 2025
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................inflation
if i might drone on about my much-favoured sport of cyclocross, at the start of each race, a cameraman will walk across the width of the starting grid to portray those on the front line as they ready themselves for between 50 minutes and one hour of eyeballs-out racing across a parcours that can feature anything from planks to be jumped, to deep sand, mud, seriously undulating ground, steep, slippery climbs and descents that replicate the latter, but downwards. while world tour riders occasionally find stages or sections thereof, cancelled due to snow, flooding or the odd landslide, those are, if you'll forgive the non-vegan description, the cyclocross rider's 'meat and potatoes'.
but as the camera shows the cream of the crop, it will almost certainly take a downward look at the tyre choices made by the selfsame riders. to all intent and purpose, there are two principal tubular tyre suppliers to the top levels teams: dugast (owned by vittoria) and challenge. i favour the latter in clincher format, predominantly because it is well nigh impossible to obtain other than dugast tubulars. these have remained popular with cyclocross riders because of the huge range of pressures available. if the course is particularly muddy, the riders will often opt to run their tubs at such low pressures, that clinchers would simply roll off the rim. the flatter the tread, the greater the grip in mud or snow.
the trade-off, however, is that such low pressures are rarely able to fend off punctures, should hidden rocks or tree roots poke through the mud. in world tour road-racing events, punctures are quickly dealt with by a following team car, ready and waiting with a sizeable collection of wheelsets, to pull to the side of the road, replace the errant wheel and have the rider on his or her way as quickly as possible.
cyclocross courses are hardly able to support a lengthy trail of support vehicles across the terrain as described above. a cyclocross course is required to have a minimum width of three metres, scarcely a dimension that would allow for ease of use by a team car, but certainly not a width that would allow them to pass each other in order to reach a stranded rider. therefore, cyclocross courses offer pits, often accessible at two different points of the course, and into which the riders can pop (every lap if they wish), to change bikes, particularly if a puncture demands that they do. the downside is that the pits are only accessible from the course, and must be entered and departed from designated points. therefore, if suffering a puncture just after passing the pits, the rider may have to run the majority of the course to reach the pit entrance. running in the opposite direction is forbidden.
thus, both road racing and cyclocross have their different means of continuance following a puncture, removing any need for a rider to carry a pump of some sort in a rear pocket. in fact, i'm not even sure that cyclocross skinsuits have any pockets.
but, in order to compete successfully at any level, some sort of training is required. 'cross and road riders can, if they wish, do so on static trainers indoors, but at some point in their careers, they will have to venture out of doors, and more than likely, without the benefit of a following team car, essentially requiring that they possess at least basic mechanical skills in order to forestall a long walk home. the most likely malfeasance experienced by any cyclist, is that of a puncture. granted, the advent of the tubeless tyre promised an end to deflationary moments that would previously have necessitated inserting a new inner tube, and inflating to a pressure that might at least get them home.
however, not everyone has opted to switch to tubeless, and the format itself is hardly foolproof, so it would be a real optimist who left home on a training ride without some form of pump on the bike frame or in a rear pocket.
you will, perhaps, recall that, earlier this year, the very nice people at cycplus sent me an as2 pro max battery powered electronic pump, one that fits easily into a rear pocket and, when required, inflates a tyre to precisely the pre-determined pressure in a matter of minutes, with little in the way of exertion by yours truly. i never leave home on my bike without it. they have now partnered with the bahrain victorious world tour team, supplying them with the very pump that occupies one of my own rear pockets (i can assure you, that the cycplus pump is the only thing i have in common with santiago buitrago, lenny martinez and matej mohoric).
as if to echo what i have outlined above, bahrain victorious managing director, milan erzen, said, "these mini electric pumps give our riders the confidence to go out and train without worry. They're faster and more dependable than hand pumps or co2 canisters, and small enough to fit in a back pocket so riders can get straight back to riding after a flat."
but this partnership is about more than just handing over a batch of mini-electric pumps in exchange for a logo on the team jerseys. according to longpeng zhou, ceo at cycplus, they expect to use the team's comments and professional insight to improve the product and develop future options that will hopefully benefit you and i in the process.
there are many technical innovations expressly developed for the professional classes that, to be honest, are of little direct benefit to the rest of us. even the most rarefied carbon layup and wind tunnel testing is mostly of academic use at our end of the world. but a quicker and more efficient pump? well, who would say no?
friday 14 november 2025
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................it's a steel
as you will be tired of hearing, my principal road bicycle at present, is a steel ritchey logic with a carbon fibre fork. it bears a ritchey cockpit, consisting of bars, stem, carbon seatpost and ritchey saddle, with componentry sourced from vicenza, namely a campagnolo twelve-speed, mechanical record groupset. wheels were handbuilt by condor cycles in london, and consist of a campagnolo record hubset, mavic open-pro rims and 32, sapim double-butted stainless steel spokes built three-cross on each rim. tyres are challenge 700x28c strada.
give or take a few pounds, the total cost of the above, had i need of replacing tomorrow, would be in the region of £4500. it is an excellent bike which i have enjoyed riding for the last eight years, and, at my time of life, one i am in no hurry to upgrade, now or in the future. should you wish to avail yourself of a more or less identical frameset, the rim-brake version retails at £1392. a disc version is available, but currently unavailable until 2026.
one of the ritchey's stablemates in thewashingmachinepost bikeshed, however, is a colnago master frameset, featuring a chromed precisa, straight steel fork, and in this particular case, a carbon-fibre rear triangle. i don't believe this particular version is currently available from cambiago, but the current iteration of the master frameset can be had for approximately £2,500. the biggest problem i have with the colnago, in common with several other italian framesets, is their proclivity to chrome the lugs, seatstays and drive-side chainstay, for although attractive to behold, in a salt-sea laden atmosphere, no matter what defence protocols you implement, i can pretty much guarantee that it will only be a matter of weeks until the rust takes hold.
embarrassingly, i have had review bicycles sent to me that, when returned after the (usually three-week) review period had ended, already had rust on the brake pinch bolts and the stem bolts.
however, having adopted the less intricate and arguably less desirable method of joining steel tubes, colnago recently introduced the steelnovo 70th anniversary bicycle, featuring hidden welds, augmented with 3d printed parts and featuring custom made components. this particular bicycle was only available as a limited edition, with a price tag that would have brought tears to your eyes. however, cambiago has now opted to repeat the exercise, this time sporting two new colourways and a less limited production run. as a complete bicycle it can be purchased either with shimano's dura-ace di2 and enve wheels or campagnolo's wireless 13-speed super record groupset and bora wheels, still with price tags that would make you cry.
they have highlighted that the method of conjoining those steel tubes is by means of welding and brazing, but definitely not with external lugged construction. it has been said that the former are more economical and possibly more efficient means of frame-building, though i have a sneaking suspicion there are still many of us who long for the days of lugs (even though my ritchey is tig-welded). colnago claim that the steelnovo frameset features internal 3d printed lugs, 'creating a bicycle that feels timeless, yet entirely modern.' having never ridden one of these bicycles, i am in no position to argue or disagree.
however, steel was pretty much the only material of choice throughout the majority of the bicycle's history, partly through practical reasoning, and at least in part because it was relatively cheaply available. had the bicycle exhibited costs more readily associated with the motor car in the 1940s and 50s, it's very unlikely it would have become the transport of choice that it undoubtedly became. in the contemporary market, where carbon fibre rules the roost, paying upwards of £12,000 or £13,000 for a complete bike seems to have become the norm. even colnago's recently released track bike frameset easily reached around £7,000 alone.
according to colnago, and i'm inclined to take its words as hyperbole, the steelnovo brings us 'steel reinvented.' quite how they have managed to do so is left unexplained,, but i tend to think that the steelnovo's tubes are little different from those featured on many other, high-end road bikes. that said, it allegedly takes an entire day to produce a single steelnovo frameset, with production limited to 400 frames per year 'underscoring its exclusivity and artisanal quality.' perhaps unsurprisingly, the cost of owning one of these exclusive and artisanal frames is not cheap. colnago list the retail price as 5,500 euros. a direct exchange reveals that to be £4,800, but more often than not, the uk retail price tends simply to replace the euro sign with a pound sign.
it would take quite some persuasion to have me believe that a colnago steelnovo frameset costing more than my complete ritchey logic bicycle, is good value for money. however, as has been made plain, even by me, if that's the cost of admission, no-one's forcing you or me to buy it.
and at least the downtube logo is of a discreet size.
thursday 13 november 2025
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................name and shame
it may well be a similar story at various locations around the uk, but it's particularly true on islay. the original islay hotel was built in port ellen in 1888, a few hundred metres from the present day ferry terminal, and closed down 111 years later in 1989, only a couple of years after mrs washingmachinepost and i moved to the hebrides. i am reliably informed that my newly realised presence on the island had nothing to do with the closure. in 2007, the old building was demolished to make way for a brand new building, but continuing with the traditional name, after several alternatives were shelved due to a lack of popularity amongs the investors.
in 2022, however, the modern-day islay hotel was sold to glenmorangie and subsequently substantially and controversially redecorated inside, while the exterior was simply given an ardbeg-tinged makeover. the latter was perhaps an obvious step given that the new owners opted to change the name to ardbeg house, despite its location being over three miles from the village of ardbeg and from which the distillery gained its name. there's no doubt these changes have incurred both criticism and resentment, particularly since the parent company continually insist they have islay's history and heritage at heart. the only original part to survive the changeover, is the name of the islay bar; a token gesture at best.
the hotel has been open for only a few months, but is still referred to as the islay hotel by many, a habit that might take quite some time to disappear. this has happened with many retail outlets and hotels around the island, several still referred to by their original names, even though those who owned or operated them are long gone. for instance, two of the cottages in bowmore village square belonging to the distillery, were once a general traders known as hodkinsons, or hodki's, and to which they are still often referred, despite the gentleman of that name having passed on decades ago.
similarly, the car dealership and garage opposite the airport. despite the current owner having taken over years ago, it is still often made reference to by the name of the previous incumbent.
there could, of course, be many reasons for this state of affairs; it's possible that, in a moment of distraction, conversants might not recall the present appellation, but more often than not, it serves to highlight a form of nostalgia, and a superficial rejection of changes within the community. the fact that mainland pressures have inveigled their way into island life in recent years, is recognised and resented by many, quite frequently, including yours truly. if i might cite glenmorangie's protestations that they have great respect for islay's history and heritage; if that really were true, they could have retained the name islay hotel, and simply replaced the letter 'a' in islay with the ardbeg logo.
there are many instances of the hebrides being misappropriated by those from elsewhere, either through ignorance of that in which they meddle, or through misplaced efforts to educate the local population.
at one time, this could have legitimately been categorised as a failure to move with the times, but as objectively as i can, i think i now agree with those who see it as a lack of respect for a way of life that few at corporate headquarters either comprehend or wish to participate. but just try telling diageo that you have a new name for guinness, and see how far you get.
it therefore comes as somewhat of a disappointment to learn that flanders classics has opted to re-name their gent-wevelgem event, which, after 92 years, will heretofore be known as in flanders fields - from middelkerke to wevelgem. if you consider that recent editions of the race have been originating in ypres, some 80km from gent, without any apparent need for a name change, why now? middlekerke is a further 40km north of ypres. but realistically, how many of us riding in the sunday peloton next march, are going to ask our colleagues, are you going to watch 'in flanders fields - from middelkerke to wevelgem', on tnt sports this afternoon? jeez, i had enough of a problem when they changed het volk to het nieuwsblad.
but, just like ardbeg house, this is what happens when money becomes involved. flanders classics have agreed a ten year start deal with the town of middelkerke. i can do nothing but despair.
wednesday 12 november 2025
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................draw the line
"the line is drawn in silence, marked in truth"
at the risk of making myself unpopular with those of a more esoteric nature, i'm someone really not in favour of poetry. it's eminently possible that i suffered at the hands of primary school academia, where english class frequently consisted of examining the works of poets such as seigfried sassoon, or perhaps much later in life, when i studied a-level english literature, a portion of which involved the so-called metaphysical poets; john donne, andrew marvell and the other boys in the band. it is possible that i might actually have enjoyed their prodigious output simply as poems, were it not that each had to be forensically analysed and dissected word by word, entirely removing the spark that revealed them as poetry, rather than misconstrued prose.
the latter misapprehension may have been the trigger that had me then, and now, classify any form of poetry and those who compose it - other than the dreadful doggerel that constitutes birthday adverts in our local newspaper - as pretentious. why, for instance, do we have a poet laureate, frequently commissioned to write poems commemorating notable steps along the united kingdom's timeline? in this respect, i am enough of a philistine to seriously question why poetry, and not immediately comprehensible narrative? in other words, i am at somewhat of a loss to understand the ultimate point of poetry in the first place.
unless, of course, the 'poetry' is in the form of song lyrics (though i harbour grave doubts about some of those too).
if i might very quickly distance myself from the above in order to step into another form of possible controversy, let's have a brief and hopefully productive discussion about the cycle industry; more specifically, those who manufacture the bulk of the worlds' carbon fibre frames over which it is hoped we will drool while handing over our credit cards. firstly, allow me to offer a tangible disparity between manufacturing and building. in truth, there may not be a gulf of difference, but bicycle builders are those we classify as artisans labouring alone in their space, joining metal tubes with care and skill. manufacturers undertake a recognisably similar process, but one which takes place in large eastern factories, resulting in large inventories which require a marketing department to sell to the great unwashed.
that would be you and i.
for reasons that will quite possibly remain as obscure as they currently appear, it is the job of the marketing department to separate the industrial reality, from the emotional attachment it is hoped to create or foster. even those of us who need little persuasion to approach cycling as if it were more important than life itself, will be subject to the blue-sky thinking that brought us the latest marketing campaign. superficially, a carbon fibre frame is identified as a collection of tubes, constituted to form a structure that is greater than the sum of its parts. however, the reality is that tubes effectively disappeared when the industry moved to carbon monocoques, where each frame consists of two identical halves of one-piece, moulded carbon. in effect, when complete, a monocoque frame is one endless, awkwardly shaped tube.
and there is good reason why bicycle marketing material rarely, if ever, asks the man or woman in the street to 'buy our awkwardly shaped tube'. to offer a body-swerve, marketing attempts to create myth and legend around the results of their manufacturing prowess, playing on our emotions to have us believe that which we're about to purchase is, in fact, precisely not what it is we are actually about to purchase. you can label such efforts or smoke and mirrors in any manner that equates with your own apprehensions, but strip that state-of-the-art bicycle to its constituent parts, and no matter your emotional attachment, it is but an awkwardly shaped carbon tube of varying diameters.
of course, i have pilloried bicycle advertising in previous years, a majority of which seems to consist of an angled image of said bicycle, accompanied by a copyriter's version of "we make these; buy one." they all do it to a greater or lesser degree, but the latest to overindulge in the metaphysical, producing a campaign that confuses far more than it educates, is spain's orbea, with their draw the line campaign.
according to the basque-based bicycle company, "It's an attitude. A statement of intent. A way to honour those who open paths no one has travelled before, those who decide with conviction where the limits are, and above all, those who choose to leave a mark that truly matters." personally, i'd favour someone drawing the line under those who adopt such fully-fledged pretentiousness. i can only imagine how embarrassing it must be for those who own an orbea.
orbea: draw the line (youtube)
tuesday 11 november 2025
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