..........................................................................................................................................................................................................
observation
just for a smidgeon of amusement at the start of the week, perhaps you could read the following list and let me know if any actually mean anything to you? assa abloy, telenet, sunseeker, bingoal, pgs group, vandaele, maes, electro depot, and the possibly open to double-entendre, prik & tik. my point is, to a certain extent, based on the not unnatural assumption that you'll possibly have heard of only one, and that depends greatly on your appreciation of belgian beers.
though i hope you'll not think less of me, those names are all culled from the banners around the parcours of yesterday's super-prestige cyclocross event in ruddervoorde. from what i can gather, these advertisers sign up for an entire season's worth of 'cross races pertaining to a particular trophy series. that may or may not explain a total lack of x2o badkamers adverts or any for exact software, as both of those sponsor their own series of races. but looked at from a particular point of view (in this case, that of yours truly), there's a possibility that certain points have been missed.
the cyclocross events televised on tnt sports (and believe me, it gives great pain to even provide them with a name check) originate predominantly in belgium and holland, therefore the team sponsors (pauwels sauzen, crelan correnden, and the like) are centred around those countries. in the majority of cases, the products or services they provide are unavailable on this side of the channel. when was the last time you looked for willy naessens' phone number?
that alone, undoubtedly explains our lack of recognition with regard to the trackside banners. but i do wonder whether those watching the racing on belgian or dutch tv, or even those attending the events in person, are any better informed than you or i? for instance, the names listed at the outset are frequently all that can be seen on those banners; there is often little by way of additional information to enlighten the ignorant. to a certain extent, that would seem to undermine the basic tenets of advertising and marketing strategy. perhaps i would greatly benefit from whatever it is that vandaele sells or provides, but i'll probably never know. granted, i could simply look it up on the interwebs, but had i not written it down while watching the race, there's no way i'd have remembered the name after i'd switched channels to watch the big bang theory.
there are certain brands of an international nature, that can comfortably survive without the additional information; straight off i can think of apple, shell and possibly red bull, all of whom can be recognised simply by sight of a logo. of course, the banner advertisers at european cyclocross events have to cope with the obvious disadvantage that they may only be seen for a few seconds at a time during the average broadcast, but frequently the banners are arranged in a lengthy series around the track perimeter, surely allowing one to provide the name or logo, and subsequent banners providing greater insight into that which they represent? but of course, from the viewpoint of a british audience, that's probably of academic interest.
however, it seems that my observational skills were encouraged by the insolent notating of advertisers, and at several points, strayed to the bicycles ridden by almost the entire peloton (if, indeed, one can refer to a cyclocross start list as such). and this almost casual observation elicited that cyclocross bicycles are less prone to the vicissitudes of velocipedinal fashion, unlike those ridden by participants in the world tour. for instance, the oddity that is colnago's v1rs, is thankfully unseen. by this, i mean the lack of an actual seat tube and a seatpost that has to be cut at an angle.
that said, i believe there are two specific points worth making.
firstly, almost without exception, the bicycles from ridley, stevens, bianchi, canyon et al feature horizontal top tubes. that may simply be to aid the practice of shouldering the bicycle at strategic points of the course, but it could just as easily demonstrate that maintaining a geometrically congruous double-diamond is still a desirable state of affairs. and while we're on the subject of congruous diamond shapes, once again, almost every bicycle ridden by cyclocross' top riders has the seatstays join the seat tube at the rear of the top tube, just like they used to do in the good old days. yet, the majority, if not all of those to be seen in the world tour peloton have succumbed to dropping them half-way down the seat-tube, a fashion for which i have been unable to gain a sound engineering explanation.
isn't cyclocross just the best?
monday 20 october 2025
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................two
just as i sat down to write today's monologue, i checked the weather forecast for sunday, one which did not make for comfortable reading, given the indicator for heavy rain commencing around 6am and continuing until at least 7pm in the evening. and while that rain is in progress, the wind gusts were expected to increase from 54kph to around 65kph. i need not explain that winds of that speed are on the edge of what is possible on a bicycle; and even if achievable, let me tell you, from personal experience, it's not much fun. the fact that the winds are east, south easterly, means they're not going to be warm. bearing that in mind, you may understand why the velo club has tacitly agreed to stay at home and watch super-prestige cyclocross.
so far, calmac are hedging their bets, not yet having announced any cancellations for sunday, though there's still time.
when conversing with my newsagent on saturday afternoon, i was gently chided for having capitulated quite so early in the weekend. i do take that to heart, because i have seen the day when i would have cast safety concerns aside, and gone cycling in any case. tautologically, that led me on to the observation that there are, in fact, two distinct strains of cyclist when it comes to inclement weather, and that while i always identified with the second option, i'm concerned that i might be turning into the first.
to clarify, there are those midst the peloton, other than the professional classes, who own waterproofs, but view them as damage limitation. in other words, a waterproof jacket is either worn at the point of departure, but purely as a precautionary measure, or stowed in a back pocket ready for when the first few drops appear on the oakleys. the second group, and irrespective of your actual proclivities, is the group that the majority either inhabit, or wish they did. this agglomeration of cyclists harbours no fear of the weather; if it's sunday, it's bike-ride time, one to be undertaken no matter the amount of precipitation or strength of the wind. for this class of velocipedinists, waterproofs are a weapon, not a refuge.
it is comforting, nonetheless, to watch the various cycling apparel purveyors frantically search for the holy grail; an effective replacement for goretex shakedry, in truth, the only fabric to provide the ultimate shield from the weather. from personal experience and anecdotal reviews, shakedry was the first waterproof material that not only breathed to an effective degree, but didn't let a single droplet of rain past the no-fly zone.
the worldwide ban on the use of so-called forever chemicals, several of which were used in the production of the original goretex membrane, has rendered shakedry persona non-grata, and there are more than just a few of us who are fervently hoping that the shakedry jacket in the cycling wardrobe, not only survives for several years yet, but that we manage not to put on an undue amount of weight, so that it continues to fit the honed physique. in my own case, the medium-size rapha pro-team shakedry jacket i possess, along with the majority of pro-team jackets and jerseys, is a remarkably close fit, one that i try-on every couple of months, just to check that, even with a very narrow waist, that the full-length zip still fastens.
however, following that short digression, there exists an essentially unconnected group of sunday cyclists who are rarely discouraged by poor weather, a state-of-mind that usually has to be gradually acquired, predominantly by heading out into the wide, grey yonder in all weathers.
though i generally profess to be amongst this number, there was a time when even the threat of rain had me pacing the sitting room carpet for hours on end, convinced that, if i left it just another half hour, the clouds would clear and signal the grand départ. unfortunately, usually by the time that happened, it was effectively too late to ride anywhere, and i was hell to live with for the remainder of the day. after several repeats of the above, it gradually dawned on me that this was likely to be a recurring pattern for the decades to come, and either i went cycling, or found a different hobby. that was the point at which i became a fully-paid up member of group two.
my only concession to such meteorological conditions was perhaps a shortening of the parcours.
i have said on numerous occasions, that i might have an entirely different approach were we talking about the daily commute, where a task, or tasks had to be undertaken on arrival at my destination while dripping all over the carpet. however, as far as the sunday ride is concerned, no matter where you are in the world, it inevitably consists of riding in circles before heading home for a warm shower and a change of clothes. in situations such as the latter, why become concerned about becoming windswept and interesting? i appreciate that adopting that particular state of mind is easier said than done, but a concerted effort can overcome any objections.
events such as the soon-to-be-upon-us festive 500 are ideal. in my third year of attempting those 500 kilometres over the course of eight consecutive days, it not only rained on every single one of them, but was frequently accompanied by galeforce winds. due to the latter, i'd to remain at home on one of those days, as, like sunday would appear to emulate, it was simply too dangerous to ride. that meant i'd to upgrade from an average 63km per day to 72km each day. by the time the new year's day ride was finished, inclement weather no longer held any fears, and i had webbed feet.
the conundrum for those who have read this far, is to decide with which group your allegiance lies, and whether that needs to change. i am concerned that my capitulation over sunday's weather has now conferred group one status upon me while i still long for the legendary status that ensued from belonging to group two. the stumbling block, as far as i can see, is the concern demonstrated by friends, family and mrs washingmachinepost since my health blip in march this year. the subterfuge might be, however, to lie low for this winter, and resume my tenacity in the new year.
it's hard to let go.
image: rapha shadow jacket
sunday 19 october 2025
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................this is luxury you can('t) afford
we have long been told that cycling's rich heritage was born of working class ambition enabling individual members of society to drag themselves from the foothills of humanity into the portent of financial security, both for themselves and their families. fausto coppi elevated his aspirations from the prospect of toiling on the tuscan landscape, to becoming il campionissimo, one of the greats in velocipedinal history. many of those who participated in the first tour de france of 1903, formerly lived in penury, the prospect of sizeable prize-money providing the impetus to adopt the way of the bicycle with greater enthusiasm than encouraged by the mere sight of the bicycle alone.
throughout the majority of its 100+ years of existence, the bicycle has frequently been seen as the mode of transport, perhaps unwillingly, adopted by the proletariat. unable to afford a motor car or even public transport, the bicycle was the saviour of many all across the world. even today, the attitude of many a motorist is based on viewing the average cyclist as lower class, despite the not unlikely scenario that many bicycles being more valuable than the average used car. if you have not yet watched vittorio de sica's 1948 tearful movie, the bicycle thieves, i'd advise ordering the dvd before reading the remainder of this monologue.
nowadays, however, there's an argument for proposing the bicycle as more of a luxury item. to celebrate being chosen as the official bicycle of la vuelta, colnago released a limited edition, c68 rosso with an eyewatering price-tag of £19,000. hardly the mode of transport espoused by the so-called working class. but more earnest blogs than the post have seriously discussed the ever-widening wealth gap headed by the divisive head of tesla and space x, elon musk, currently estimated to be the world's wealthiest man with over £366 billion in the bank. i recall, in the 1970s, listening to futurists claiming that the advent of the computer would eventually lead to an excess of leisure time for all of humanity, while this computer enabled wealth would fund the less onerous activities of very early retirement.
what no-one seems to have postulated, or even considered, is that those who fostered this improved wealth creation would pretty much keep it all to themselves, rather than sharing it amongst those whose efforts had helped foster such a benevolent financial state of affairs in the first place. however, making tangential reference to the notion that 'cycling is the new golf', there's every probability that cycling amongst the middle-aged man in lycra (mamil) has raised its profile among the relatively well-heeled. it would be hard to imagine velominati's rule #12 (n+1) making any inroads to the clubhouse in the early part of the 20th century.
however, a bit like my constant attempt to justify just why i own two expensive drumsets and six snare drums, despite barely qualifying as a semi-pro drummer, it's every bit as hard to reason why many of us own several bicycles, yet not a single professional contract or local event entry form amongst us. the current excuse on which i have settled for owning so many drums is plain and simple: i found myself able to afford them, so why not? which seems every bit as applicable to a bike shed full of bicycles.
but, unless there's a velocipedinal equivalent of elon musk, there has to come a time when you might conceivably own every bike or glittering component that your heart desires. the word 'desire' was not chosen by accident, for even when that state appears to have been more than satisfied, the desire itself may not simply evaporate. it should come as no real surprise that i am already considering one more snare drum, of which i demonstrably have no particular need, and i would be less than surprised to learn that many of you in bicycle-land are scouring the websites for fresh trinketry on which to spend your hard-won bitcoin. and given that the bicycle industry forms an integral part of the service industry, they are poised and well-positioned to provide that service to those who wish to avail themselves of their altruism.
the latest in the above sequence is brought to you by vicenza, having very recently announced a few upgrades to their well-received and reviewed super-record 13 wireless groupset. depsite having reduced the cost of the second iteration of this groupset to sub £4,000, they now seek to recoup the difference by offering you a new carbon/alloy outer chainring, ceramic bearings for the bottom bracket, and a new cassette machined from a solid block of titanium, and featuring a £620 price ticket.
let's be perfectly honest here; nobody needs any of this stuff. even with ceramic bearings in the bottom bracket, none of us are going to reach the leather sofa in debbie's any quicker than we currently achieve. of course, having spent in excess of £1,000 pounds on these eexpensive, yet trivial enhancements, it well behoves the well-remunerated member of the sunday peloton to ensure that he or she, makes constant mention of them at every opportunity.
where's the point in ownership if you can't practice at least a smidgeon of one-upmanship?
image: campagnolo
saturday 18 october 2025
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................the style factor
the vicissitudes of the planning department of argyll & bute council are plain to see for all, in the manner they appear to be shuffling the environment in which yours truly has opted to live. only a few leaps and bounds from the croft is a house which has been under construction for longer than i can truthfully recall, and the design of which bears no resemblance whatsoever to the buildings which surround it. on the right are two single-storey, traditional cottages, while on the opposite side is an unoccupied two-storey house, long since vacant and owned by bowmore distillery. its design is what might also be referred to as traditional and its dowdy whitewashed exterior a commonality across the hebrides.
the house to which i refer is reputedly of modern design, with the roof higher on one side than the other and with large windows seemingly randomly placed about its person. what is not visible on its contemporaneity is any sign of chimneys. granted, it appears that the house will feature all-electric heating, but the two, semi-detached cottages built across the road within the last decade, were required to fit 'dummy chimneys, reputedly to fit in with the surrounding houses. four houses built within sight of the croft were also excluded from such a demand, despite every single proximitous house featuring one chimney per residence.
it seems the imposition of standards is akin to a moving target.
and when en-route to debbie's in bruichladdich, but only a kilometre or two from bridgend village, again under construction is a very large house resembling little more than a sports pavilion, featuring floor to ceiling windows overlooking the head of the loch. while its modeernity is completely out of keeping with traditional hebridean tradition, that particular aspect is made determinedly worse by its siting adjacent to an elderly, traditional house and conjoined quaint cottage, with tiny, trellised windows. the contrast can only be described as stark, and many have questioned the sanity of the region's planning department in allowing this to pass the planning application.
depending on your architectural point of view, islay's original hebridean housing embodies a remarkably pleasing aesthetic, one that is peppered all across the island. but this aesthetic is being seriously challenged by an ever-increasing preponderance of new-build kit houses, many raised at the behest of wealthy retirees, but clearly designed on a purely functional and economic basis. the majority of these demonstrate remarkably little in the way of traditional design, and there is clearly no intent on the part of the council planning department to retain any of islay's heritage, though i, and others, are at a loss to explain why.
to an extent, it is perhaps a tad unfair to single out the local planning department, for the majority of 21st century innovation seems less than concerned with adopting most (or any) of the 20th century's best practice. bicycles pretty much all look identical these days, aside from the colours and name on the downtube. likewise the motor car, which bears a verisimilitude with that of the cycle industry by making its vehicles all but indistinguishable from each other. even with the addition of electrons.
i am not a motor engineer, nor, come to that, a cycle engineer. therefore i am not fully aprised of the plusses and minuses applicable to the design of either. but i cannot be the only one to have noted that the majority of electric cars resemble nothing more than their internal combustion bedfellows but with panels blanking out the radiator grills. is it not possible that the electric motors could be made to occupy less boxy surroundings? likewise the e-bike, the vast majority of which are not only as dull as dishwater from a design point of view, but almost invariably appear to be painted with varying shades of mud.
is not this the century in which we were due to be approaching the era of the jetsons, when we ought to be living in the jet age, with all that this was once forecast to entail? should it not be that the manufacturers of e-bikes, many of whom are not hidebound by any connection to velocipedinal tradition, provide us with futuristic design, employing swoopy curves rather than the rudimentary box shapes with which we have been served? after all, the raleigh chopper originated in 1968 and the to-die-for colnago arabesque surfaced in 1984. compare that with the just-released gazelle avignon e-bike.
need i say more?
wednesday 15 october 2025
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................replication
thirty three cyclists - daredevils, visionaries and adventurers by david houghton. open circle press paperback. 242pp illus. £11.15
at the risk of preaching to the gallery, i doubt that there's anyone here who doesn't hold the bicycle in high regard, aware of its significance in the grand scheme of things and that, for many of us, eminently greater than the sum of its parts. that said, the bicycle itself is - and i mean no disrespect - simply an inert object. even tadej's colnago and wout's cervelo are nothing more than admirable means of transport, sporting state of the art carbon construction and associated componentry. but without their renowned masters, by themselves, they can achieve virtually nothing at all. and were uae team emirates or visma lease-a-bike to freely hand those bicycles to you or i, they'd hardly become the objects of admiration they have doubtless become.
even a cursory glance at the title of the book under discussion will elicit that the third word is cyclists. were that insufficient of a clue, it seems highly unlikely that the daredevils, visionaries and adventurers are adjectives describing the inert objects outlined above. on the contrary, david houghton's excellent book refers to the individuals, both male and female, who have made use of the bicycle to achieve that which houghton has spent thirty-three chapters and almost 250 pages to describe.
to quote from the author's introduction, "...what truly brings this bony machine to life is people. For two centuries, people have turned to the bicycle to defy the boundaries of speed, distance, and, very often, common sense."
the varied chapters are arranged more or less, chronologically, beginning with karl drais (or, to give him his full title, karl christian ludwig freiherr drais von sauerbronn), largely credited with inventing one of the earliest bicycle shaped objects in 1816: the laufmaschine or draisine. this two-wheeled object was bereft of pedals, requiring the 'rider' to walk briskly while astride the wooden horse.
by 1839, the latter had begun the transformation from a dandy-horse into a boneshaker, but the chapter does not provide credit to the originator of the pedal system; probably one of those eternal unknowns. however, i should disavow the notion that this book simply offers a dry reprise of the history of the bicycle as we know it. mr houghton's narrative is a great deal more entertaining than that, illustrating the path to the bicycle as we know it by way of anecdotes and important stories in its development, particularly if those stories involve, speed, distance, or a combination of the two.
"NO MATTER HOW PRIMITIVE the bicycle, no matter how bumpy or muddy the path, cyclists have always fixated on riding as fast as their legs and lungs will allow."
the former aspect (speed) was certainly one that eventually led to the arrival of the safety bicycle. until that point, the legendary penny farthing had ruled the roost, mostly from a great height. "With any bicycle that had pedals attached directly to the front wheel, there was only one way to go faster. That was to increase the size of the wheel." the so-called safety bicycle acquired its name relative to the dangers of riding the penny farthing, providing a verisimilitude of the modern-day bicycle.
though the author has made a superb job of illustrating just how we arrived at two equally-sized wheels, chain drive and an ever-increasing number of gears, at a remarkable early part of the book, he alludes to an unrequited aspect of velocipedinal science. "To this day, scientists still can't agree on why bicycles stay upright [...] The bicycle represents (an) embarrassing hole in the accomplishments of physics."
but just like recent cycle sport history, it seems all roads lead to mark cavendish and his trouncing of eddy merckx' long-serving record of stage wins in the tour de france. we reach this culmination by way of albert einstein, john kemp starley, late 19th century round the world cyclist, annie cohen kopchovsky, the wright brothers, and several other individuals of whom i'm willing to bet you've never heard. even if only for that reason alone, this is one of the most fascinating and enjoyable books it has been my pleasure to read; it's the sort of volume which reviewers of far greater perspicacity than yours truly, would be likely to describe as one which transcends its subject.
the writing is intelligent, the research impressive and perhaps most importantly, the reading remarkably easy, considering the copious depths covered by many of the thirty-three chapters. with christmas looming on the horizon, this would make the perfect present for the cyclist in your life, male or female. david houghton cleverly imparts over 200 years of velocipedinal tradition without ever making it seem like a history lesson.
an essential acquisition for anyone who considers themselves a cyclist. as an added bonus, the book features a copious bibliography at the back, along with a painstakingly comprehensive index. and a portion of the proceeds will go to world bicycle relief.
purchase thirty-three cyclists on amazon
tuesday 14 october 2025
..........................................................................................................................................................................................................